


Cursed Words

by Godoka



Category: Far Cry (Video Games), Far Cry 5
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, F/M, Temporarily Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-21
Updated: 2019-04-07
Packaged: 2019-08-27 05:32:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16696378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Godoka/pseuds/Godoka
Summary: Anyone would be ecstatic at finding the fateful words on their forearm. Unless of course they belonged to a certain cult leader.





	1. Chapter 1

The Deputy wouldn’t normally hold her tongue. She certainly didn’t when it came to his brothers. She was never afraid to push John’s buttons and take the piss out of him and it was fun to have Jacob squirm. Yet talking to him would seal her fate, something she was desperately trying to run from, to no avail.

They were tied. The words on her forearm confirmed it. That was why she took to wrapping her arms with bandages. To hide the evidence. If anyone questioned it, she claimed it made her look tougher though Sharky reassured her she didn’t need help in that department.

“God will not let you take me” were the cursed words. They confused her as a child. She desperately wanted to understand. She concocted various scenarios in her head of how they might meet, none of them particularly romantic but she didn’t care at the time. She had someone. Now she wished the universe wouldn’t have bothered. She’d rather be without a soulmate than be constantly reminded that she was tied to a madman. And yet the world was cruel to her. Every touch, every word spoken made her chest burn, her forearm ache. She remembered seeing the word written on his arm but he was unaware and she desperately wished she was as lucky as him.

Instead of confronting it, it would be easier to run from it like she ran from the cult, she thought. And yet it hurt so much. Why did it have to be him of any people? What did she do to deserve this? He was beginning to get irritated by her, she noticed. No doubt his brothers had bitched to him about her taunting and teasing comments she gave them over the radio. Surely he must be wondering why he was the only one she refused to speak to. Would he ever put two and two together?

On his forearm was her first name, lost to everyone as soon as she became the Deputy, Rook. That hidden part of herself had just been handed over to him. She wondered if he knew how to pronounce it properly, not that it mattered much. He’d never get to utter it. She wanted to make sure of that. And so she once again stayed silent when he spoke to her, radio held up to her face. The only sound that came out of her was rugged breathing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Deputy finally gets to confess something that has been plaguing her. It doesn't make her feel any better.

The day was relatively uneventful which was usually a good thing for the Deputy. She appreciated not being bombarded with pleas for help through her radio. She understood the importance of what she was doing and she was eager to help those being terrorised by the cult but often times it got too much. They all relied on her, one person and the pressure got to her. Though she would normally be happy to have a quiet day to herself, not having something to do made her jittery. It also made her mind wander. For that reason, she had invited Sharky to join her at the Spread Eagle and keep her company.

They sat there for a few hours idly drinking and she listened to the man’s mindless chatter and ridiculous stories, interrupting every so often to chastise him lightheartedly over his poor life choices or to bring up something of interest that happened to her. She never in a million years would have imagined she would befriend such colourful people but almost every person from the resistance she had bumped into since the start of this war on the cult had been so nice to her. She found friends in unlikely places and for that she was grateful. She wished that some of them didn’t treat her like some sort of messiah but she was happy to know that she wasn’t alone. 

Yet she still felt burdened by the fact that she had to hide a part of herself. She felt fake. The Deputy knew it couldn’t be helped. If people knew, they would probably be disgusted by it or would make more of a fuss about it than she would have appreciated but something inside of her was itching to confess to someone, anyone about her shitty situation. She wanted someone to tell her it would be okay. Then Sharky took matters into his own hands without even realising it.

“So hey what’s the deal with your arms, Popo? Nick told me not to be nosy about it but that’s some sick injury if they’re still wrapped after all this time. What’d you do? I won’t judge. Scouts honour. I remember one time I got my arm stuck in a fence. Hurt like a bitch.”

“They’re not injured.” Sharky looked confused as he squinted at her, trying to figure her out.

“Well I mean, doesn’t it get uncomfortable all wrapped up like that? I don’t think I’ve seen you ever take them off. Do you shower with them on? ‘Cause I don’t think that’s very hygienic in my humble opinion, Dep…”

At that the Deputy snorted “like you know anything about hygiene, Mr piss jar collector.”

“You know what, touché. Touché.” Sharky stayed silent for a moment or two but the Deputy saw that he was visibly squirming, reeeeally wanting a satisfactory explanation. She winced in anticipation for his reaction, praying that he wouldn’t make a huge deal of it or embarrass her. She bit the bullet.

“I have a soulmate.”

That just made Sharky more confused “I mean I'm happy for you, Popo. I’d love a soulmate myself but…why’d you cover it? What if you forget what it says and then you meet, don’t realise they’re the one and boom you never see each other again. That’d majorly suck, wouldn’t it? What it say?”

“Yeah I’m pretty sure that wouldn’t happen but god, I wish I’d never have to see him again. I refuse to speak a word to that psychopath, Sharky. It’s best he doesn’t know that it’s me that he’s connected to.”

“Psychopath? Sounds rough, man. I feel for you. Hey, the Seeds are pretty psychopathic. I wonder if they have soulmates. Imagine how fucked up it’d be to be connected to one of those crazies.” The Deputy stiffened but otherwise didn’t say another word in response.

“Does it say something creepy on it? Kinda fucked up? ‘Cause then I don’t blame you for covering it. Wouldn’t want to be associated with serial killers or sum, ya feel?” Rook wordlessly stuck her arm out, unravelling the bandage on her right arm with shaky hands giving Sharky an eyeful of what was written.

_“God won’t let you take me.”_

Sharky quirked a brow “yeah see that sounds familiar but you’re gonna have to catch me up to speed here.” The Deputy groaned.

“Joseph fucking Seed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m still really unsure of where exactly this is going to go or whether I will be able to finish it but I was really surprised to see people actually liked my silly ramblings. Thank you for your support! I’m still terrified but I’ll keep uploading what I have. I hope you guys enjoy it. I had fun writing it mostly because I love Sharky. He's such a goof. Feedback is appreciated. Any ideas are also welcome.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Deputy decides what she is going to do about her predicament.

Sharky was babbling about something or the other as usual beside Rook in the car, probably about another one of his cousin’s escapades, as the radio began to play “Now He’s Our Father” mockingly. If she wasn’t paying attention to her friend’s rant before, she certainly wasn’t now, glaring at the radio with a burning intensity before switching to a different station at record speed. She didn’t mind the Peggie songs usually, much to Sharky’s distaste. As much as she hated to admit it, and would die if the man himself found out, she jammed to “Oh John” on the regular when she was alone. However, the particular song she just silenced reminded her of the bind she was in, which she was desperately trying to forget, to no avail.

Normally, the Deputy would be buzzing with joy after pissing John off. Today, with the help of her good buddy Nick, they witnessed the end of the dreaded eyesore on the side of the mountain, the yes sign, yet she couldn’t take pleasure in the victory for long. While she laughed maniacally with her pyromaniac friend at John’s outrage and threats at that moment, speaking to him left her feeling uneasy. What if John got nosy next time he snatched her in a blissed-up state and decided to see what lay under her bandages? Or, what if she blabbed and told him or Faith about her predicament herself? Or, what if in said blissed-up state she accidentally spoke to Joseph?

She knew she couldn’t escape it forever. It would happen sooner or later. However, she didn’t know whether it was better to bite the bullet or put it off as much as possible. He was going to get her to speak eventually, her game was childish and wouldn’t last. The problem lay in the fact that if she did give in and speak to him, there was no way in hell he’d let her leave like he usually did, something she still didn’t understand fully, or he could get pissy. No matter what she threw at him, he seemed to turn a blind eye. Not angry but disappointed, he claimed. However, she didn’t want to test him and see what he would do about the ultimate slight. She wondered how someone would feel if they knew they were unwanted by their soulmate. Was that even possible?

Rook wished she had just walked away that night and refused to cuff him, go back with the rest of her colleagues and leave Hope County to burn, as awful as such a thought was. They had the Resistance, the militia and the Cougars. Sure they were a little hopeless without someone like her to force them into action with her recklessness and disregard for safety but she gave them the first push in the right direction. Surely, they’d get by without her.

Was it still an option to just run, get in a Peggie car and hightail as far away from Montana as possible? Where would she even go? Biting her lip, she instinctively leaned slightly out of the moving car to shoot a Peggie to her left without so much as a second thought. This whole mess had really desensitised her and it scared her.

Sharky was suddenly silent, watching Rook with a small frown.

“You okay, Dep? You’ve been awful quiet. Thought you’d be happy after we blew the shit out of the sign like ya wanted.”

“I am happy, Shark” she began “I just can’t stop thinking about this stupid mark. You think it’s an option to burn this shit off?”

“I cannot condone the use of fire in this particular situation.”

“Mighty sensible of you. I was kidding. Mostly” she added as they pulled up into Fall’s End “Why don’t I just end my misery?”

“That’s a bit much, ain’t it?”

“Sharky, I’m kidding.”

“So, what’re you gonna do?”

“What do you think I should do?” she turned to him, as the car stood at a standstill. Feeling slightly uncomfortable at the serious subject matter, he rubbed the back of his neck, avoiding her curious gaze.

“Shit, I don’t know Popo. I don’t know much about this soulmate stuff. All I keep hearin’ is the universe finds a way or whatever but I don’t think you should tell him. He’s not taking you from us.”

“Hmm… but won’t he be real pissed when he eventually finds out why I’ve been giving him the cold shoulder?”

“With the amount of shit he lets you get away with Dep, I doubt it. Hey, why don’t you ask the Ryes what they think? They know about this sorta stuff better than me.”

“As much as I love them, the fewer people that know about this, the better. You didn’t tell anyone, did you?”

“Yeah about that…”

The Deputy looked murderous at the Spread Eagle. Sharky sat off to the side, nervously eyeing her every now and again, frowning at the intense glare she was giving her beer. If looks could kill. Sharky obviously couldn’t keep his mouth shut and so now half the Resistance was in on the hot gossip that their own Deputy was tied to the enemy, the very man she was actively screwing over. To be fair, she didn’t tell him to keep quiet about it. She just assumed he had enough common sense to keep the scandalous information to himself. Clearly not. She was surprised the Seeds themselves weren’t in on it yet with how many people were pestering her about it. If one more person approached her as she tried to drink away her sorrows, she’d lose it. John would have a field day if the news reached him. Finally, some good leverage, as if Hudson being tortured wasn’t enough.

People came up to her to ask if it was true or if it was just a nasty rumour. People expressed their sympathy. Some were reassuring. She wished people would just mind their own business. It was nice to get the problem off her chest to Sharky at that moment but being constantly reminded of her misery pissed her off. The Deputy especially hated the fact that now that people knew, they tread on eggshells when talking about him. They would cut themselves short of calling him names like they usually would and give her a sheepish look. She wished they would just let her continue pretending everything was okay.

Time was ticking now. The cult was everywhere. Either she’d get blissed-up and dragged to Joseph’s or they’d take her friends and use them as bait to lure her in. She didn’t want to wait and see which they’d go with. She wasn’t going to sit around and possibly put her friends in danger because of her dumb soulmate problem.

Self-sacrificing bullshit like this made her feel sick. No doubt if she told her friends about her plan, they would call her crazy. They probably wouldn’t understand, would they? At least if she made Joseph happy, perhaps she could negotiate the release of Hudson and Pratt. What would they do when they heard about this cruel twist of fate? She blamed the sleepless nights on her dumb decision. That and the fact that all she could think about of late was that stupid writing on her forearm. She would doom herself should she reveal herself to him. But hadn’t she been doomed the moment she set foot in his church, the moment she was born?

Would she get that stupid warm fulfilling feeling when their fates were finally sealed like in those sappy love stories Nancy would read, that she’d scoff at? She wasn’t delusional, Joseph Seed was a fucking nutjob but maybe she could force herself to have some semblance of happiness in the peace settling down might offer her. She laughed, looking back at how disgusted she was by the idea of being in his presence, underestimating how much the situation would get to her. Now she just wanted this to resolve.

The pull was stronger than her morals. Her fear for her friends’ safety was stronger than her common sense. And that was why she was on her way to Joseph’s compound, trying to look demure in a plain dress she managed to sneakily borrow from Kim, who’d no doubt be outraged at the idea of her giving herself in like this if she knew what was going on. She wondered how long it would take for her friends to find out what bullshit she pulled. She wondered if they could eventually understand, forgive her. She walked into the lion’s den.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The third chapter of this had been written ages ago but recently I looked back on it and hated it so I largely rewrote it. I believe it’s much better now. Writing a series makes me a bit nervous and I don’t really know why. Perhaps it’s because I am just largely making things up as I go along so I’m scared I’ll get stuck? That’s why I stick to one-shots. My writing also tends to be like 80% thoughts of the characters (mostly angsty) with like 20% actual dialogue or actions. Next chapter ought to balance that out a little bit if I don’t end up doing a complete overhaul of it as ended up happening to this one. As always, any comments are appreciated. Tell me if you think it sucks. Tell me if you liked it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Deputy visits the man that has been making her life hell.

Rather cynical about the whole soulmate thing, for most of her life she treated it as a bit of a joke. She couldn’t imagine herself with someone that would love her unconditionally, didn’t feel like she deserved such a thing for a long time. She couldn’t imagine the kind of person she would be paired with. The cryptic words on her arm didn’t help with that.

When she was little she went along with everyone else’s excitement at the writing on her arm, proudly showed off the weird phrase like she was encouraged to. Nobody thought anything weird of it. It was a gift, people insisted. She smiled, feeling special. There was someone out there just for her. They never told her that something like this could happen. She didn’t feel so special anymore. She certainly wasn’t smiling. Nothing in particular put her off the whole soulmate thing. When the change in attitude happened and why she had no clue but Rook supposed she was right to call bullshit on it when she did. Her doubts were not unfounded but her caution didn’t save her from pain.

The wooden door creaked open and immediately Joseph’s rich voice reached Rook’s ears. The whole scene gave her major deja vu. Though she tried to be as quiet as possible, at the sound, the congregation immediately turned to look at the intruder, no doubt to glare at the newcomer’s tardiness but their eyes bulged at the sight of her. When, however, she slipped into a pew at the very back, showing no sign of hostility, they hesitantly looked back at Joseph for his reaction and guidance as to what to do. He was too into his sermon to notice that his congregation was slightly distracted. He had not heard her enter nor could he see her face, hidden from view behind all of the Peggies but his siblings, who stood behind him, were more observant and she could feel them watching her with furrowed brows, trying to figure her out. It's as though they were waiting for her to suddenly attack. Braving a peek at them, she saw that Jacob was the only one acting as though nothing of incident had just happened. John looked confused. Faith began to wonder if this was the work of the bliss. She slowly blinked at the sight of the Deputy, tattered flannel long abandoned, face no longer obscured by sunglasses or a hat and no venom in her expression. The only thing that was consistent with their perceived image of the Deputy was the bandages though today the one on her left arm was gone.

Rook tried her best to not pay attention to the siblings and their attempts to intimidate her but her hands, cleaner than they have ever been, were settled in her lap and slightly shaking. She wasn’t taking in any of Joseph’s words though she didn’t doubt that what he was saying was pure evangelical nonsense. She simply felt the sound reverberate.

She couldn’t see Joseph particularly well from the back. All that stood out were his signature glasses. She did, however, notice that his upper body was clothed today. Odd. She also didn’t fail to notice how the light filtered into the room, enveloping him. The yellow glimmered in the sun and his hair looked as though it was glowing. He looked angelic. The thought of that was laughable. Her life was laughable. This was a bad idea.

When he had finished, Peggies started stirring and stumbling out of the Church, not before nervously glancing at her on their way out as if she was about to bite them if they were to stay a moment longer. She took a deep breath and looked up. Her view of him was finally unobscured and Joseph had noticed her presence and stared right back at her. John and Jacob leaned towards him, murmuring words she couldn’t make out. Likely warnings. John seemed amused, probably noticing how freaked out she looked. Jacob looked irritated by her presence now. Disconnecting their gaze, the Deputy saw that Faith was making her way towards her, the telltale whiff of bliss following her and making Rook want to gag. 

“Did you enjoy the sermon?” the siren asked with a sweet smile, though she was no doubt suspicious of the intents of their visitor like her brothers. Rook didn’t blame her at all. If things weren’t the way they were, she would have jumped John and punched him in his smug face by now.

“Ah, I wasn’t paying much attention to it,” she admitted sheepishly, nervous in front of Faith for once.

Faith’s face fell slightly at that but she brushed off her discontent.

“Did you come here to talk to the Father?”

“Yes,” the Deputy decided, sealing her fate and arguably all of theirs too.

“The Father will be pleased.” Grinning, she suddenly pulled the Deputy out of her seat and gently tugged her to the front, stopping in front of Joseph. John and Jacob began to leave and Faith followed after, though not before giving her a wave goodbye.

“I must say, my child, I did not expect to see you here today.” His gaze glided down to take in her apparel making her feel slightly self-conscious. She wondered what he thought of her new getup.

“You are always welcome here but correct me if I am wrong in saying this, your attendance isn’t a sign of you finally accepting God into your heart, is it?” He looked solemnly into her eyes but she could see a glint of mischief in his own. She shook her head and slowly raised her arm towards him, not wasting any time, making for the bandages when his hand took a hold of hers to stop it. He had an inkling of an idea as to what lay underneath, why she was here. His interest was piqued. With a pensive look, he took hold of her arm with one hand and began slowly unravelling the bandage with the other. And then he saw it and his breath hitched.

Joseph carefully put down the bandage on the pulpit behind him, held out his own arm and rolled up his sleeve. Her name came into view. She timidly reached out and touched it, stroking the skin gently, fingers tingling until she pulled away quickly to look up at him and gauge his reaction. She didn’t realise until she looked up that his mouth was twisted into a frown. She had never seen him this annoyed, not even when John tried to drown her that one time. How she wished he had succeeded.

“Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for you?” he began. Rook simply watched him owlishly. He stepped back from her slightly, closing his eyes to collect his thoughts.

“All this time, the only thing that kept me going was the thought that somewhere out there was someone made just for me,” he continued, voice slightly trembling. Rook winced.

“I thought, I thought that no matter what happened to me, it would all be worth it in the end if I found someone that would love me unconditionally. They wouldn’t care about what I’d been through, what everyone said about me. That I’m crazy, that, that I’m manipulative.” He stared hard at her, then laughed bitterly, giving her a smile that didn’t reach his eyes which remained cold and fixed on her.

“And then I find out that not only am I not wanted but that she has been actively preventing me from fulfilling my purpose, our purpose,” he raised his voice as his fists clenched, the words bouncing around the church causing her to slightly cower from him, taking a small step back. This was bad. This was really, really bad. Noticing that she was backing away from him, clearly startled by his outburst and ready to make a run for it at any moment, he gave a sigh and lowered his gaze.

“Who are you to deny me this, deny what God has given you?” he asked more calmly, looking at her expectantly. Any response she might have wanted to give was stuck in her throat. She swallowed thickly. When she finally opened her mouth to defend her actions, he held up a hand to stop her in her tracks. As if nothing had happened, as if he hadn’t just yelled at her, he gave her a soft smile.

“What is your name?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy new year! I spent the last few hours of 2018 writing this mess. We somehow made it to the fourth chapter, boys. And yet nothing has happened in the story yet. Oops! This was going to be a 5 part series but clearly, that isn’t happening. I hope this wasn’t too anti-climactic. I tried to make it dramatic. Keyword: tried. I’m slightly worried Joseph comes off as out of character in this chapter. However, he doesn’t appear to have endless patience, even for the Deputy, as was apparent by his little tantrum at his compound before the Collapse so I thought that perhaps an outburst of this nature could be plausible given the circumstances, especially considering that he might have been waiting to meet his soulmate for most of his life or all of his life. I haven’t decided how this soulmate thing really works even though I’m the one writing all of this pffft. As always, any comments are greatly appreciated. And if you have any suggestions or ideas as to where this could go from here, feel free to share.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Deputy resigns to her fate but tries to negotiate for the safety of her friends.

Rook had accepted defeat and told him her name. It felt like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders but no stupid warm mushy feeling. She was too busy feeling the anxiety eating away at her. However, she was morbidly curious over what was to come and what he would do with her. 

She felt slightly guilty earlier before the big reveal for keeping such a thing from Joseph but all of that drained away when she caught sight of his slightly smug smile. He knew he had won and he’d no doubt parade her around, announcing it to everyone. They couldn’t use her friends as leverage against her but now they’d hate her and the cult would continue terrorising the County with no real opposition. Hudson and Pratt, even the Marshall were now on their own. She really needed to learn to consult someone before she made impulsive decisions.

“My siblings should be waiting for me outside. We must tell them the wonderful news immediately.” Joseph looked genuinely excited to introduce her as his intended to his siblings but the prospect immediately made her even more queasy. She took a small step back from him and lifted a hand causing him to stop in his tracks. His smile didn’t falter but he raised a brow at her objection.

“I will come quietly, I’ll stay here with you if you free Hudson,” she crossed her arms, glaring at Joseph as his smile fell slightly. It was worth a shot, and he needed to know where she stood. He hummed in thought before he responded to her request.

“I don’t think you’ve earned that, nor are you in a position to be making such prepositions.”

“I gave myself in didn’t I?”

“You would have had no choice but to come eventually. I am also not pleased that you avoided me in such a way for several months. But I am forgiving. I will overlook this as long as you do not cause us any more trouble.”

“You’re hurting my friends, torturing them and I am simply meant to play family here with you?”

“You appear to be under the assumption that you have moral high ground over me when you are doing the same to my flock. Enough now-,” he grabbed her hand firmly as she spluttered objections “I’m sure everyone will be pleased to finally see you at my side where you belong.”

She let herself be dragged, wanting to die there and then when they stepped outside and the heralds stood at the entrance, waiting for them. A warmth at her side and the Deputy was suddenly aware of Joseph’s arm, snaked around her middle. Faith seemed to be overjoyed at such a display of affection.

“I’m sure you will be pleased to know, John, that the Deputy will no longer be causing trouble in Holland Valley. Nor will she be burning down your bliss fields, Faith.”

John quirked a brow, searching Rook’s face. She hung her head staring hard at her shoes, questioning her life choices. It was evident to the youngest brother that she didn’t want to be here but she had shown up on her own accord and she didn’t look to be planning to make a break for it. She wasn’t even visibly armed. Why was she being so complacent? Oh, how the wrathful have fallen.

“I suppose my conditioning isn’t going to be necessary then?” Jacob questioned, seeming indifferent as always but secretly slightly disappointed at not getting a chance to toy with the Resistance’s hero.

“I’m afraid not, brother. The Deputy has finally seen the light. She understands her purpose now, to join us as my soulmate.”

John’s face immediately lit up with a mocking grin.

“Now what would Hudson say about your little arrangement, Deputy?”

She lifted her head to look him dead in the eyes, a tired expression on her face but full of spite nonetheless. “You’re lucky your brother is here because if he wasn’t I would end you here and now,” she spat but John just chuckled. She didn’t appear to be such a threat, his brother’s arm draped around her and looking more like a dutiful wife than an officer.

“John, she is family. Please try to be civil,” Joseph chastised and the Deputy held back a laugh as John’s face soured, incredulous that he was the one being told off after she just threatened to kill him.

“Well, ain’t this a sight,” Jacob drawled, catching sight of and nodding at Joseph’s arm around Rook, wanting in on the fun of tormenting her.

“That extends to you too, Jacob,” she growled and the man chuckled in response.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, pup.”

Joseph ignored his brother’s teasing comments and instead turned to Faith who stood dutifully, observing their exchanges. “You are to make her feel welcome.”

Faith nodded vigorously and Joseph gave a satisfied nod.

“You chose a perfect day to come. It’s not often we can all gather for a family dinner. Faith will get you dressed more suitably and then you can join us.”

“Come along,” Faith smiled, extending her hand for Rook to take. Rook’s nose wrinkled at the proximity of Faith, the bliss immediately taking over her senses but she took the younger woman’s hand nonetheless, following her reluctantly. She was just thankful she wasn’t being dragged for once. John laughed at the sight. All Joseph could do was smile, smitten. If he could keep her this tame, the cult’s biggest obstacle would be gone, just like that.

“How perfect this is,” Faith babbled, leading Rook into what seemed to be the Father’s house.

“What is?”

“He knew you were special, that you were always destined to be with us at Eden’s gate but we never could have imagined you were his soulmate. It’s so very romantic. The leader of the Project at Eden’s Gate. The hero of the Resistance. Despite their differences, love and faith conquer all.”

“This isn’t a Shakespearean tragedy.”

“Of course not,” Faith replied with a grin, leading her up the stairs into a small room. “This will have a happy ending. Our family is now complete and we will not let any harm come to you! You will be saved.”

She didn’t need saving, thank you very much, but Rook bit her tongue and silently took the dress that Faith handed to her. It was no doubt one of her own, flowery and white and longer than the one Rook was currently wearing. As Faith turned to step outside, Rook’s arm shot out and grabbed hers in a vice-like grip causing Faith to yelp out in pain. The dress dropped to the floor.

“Let the Marshall go,” Rook grunted, eyes narrowed as Faith squinted at her.

“He is free to leave whenever he wants, Deputy, but he chooses not to. He has free will but he has chosen to stay in the bliss. Please respect that.” She shook her arm slightly in an attempt to get Rook to loosen her grip but to no avail.

“He was drugged against his will, don’t give me that shit,” Rook spat, “I won’t let you guys hurt-”

A flurry of green suddenly blinded Rook and she sunk to the floor, going slightly limp as she blinked, struggling to get her bearings. Faith rubbed at her arm but quickly recovered and smiled down at the Deputy. From the way she was sitting, Faith could make out a holster under her dress. She reached out and removed it, putting it aside and out of reach. Rook tried to stop her and reach for it but her moves were too sluggish, and her arms sank down again to her side as she resigned herself to her blissed state.

“I will have to tell Joseph that you were misbehaving, Deputy,” Faith sang “but it’s all right. I forgive you. This is all very new to you. But you’ll understand in time how much we love you.”

Faith caressed Rook’s cheek and the woman could only stare in response. 

“You will understand that this is where you belong. Your friends. Where are they now? They abandoned you. They don’t care. But we do. Now, let’s get you dressed, all right?”

Rook’s mind was beginning to clear up but she still felt too dizzy to protest and she knew she wouldn’t be able to run in this state. She let Faith lift her dress up and off her and replace it, with some difficulty, with the white one. 

“Come along now.” Faith helped her up and she staggered slightly but stood, swaying by the siren’s side. “We are going to have so much fun with you around now, Rook.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this series was initially going to be scrapped. I had no idea what I wanted to do with it and I read some amazing fanfics by others concerning the soulmate AU that I felt were so much better executed? But it’s reeeeeally not good to compare myself or my work to others, which I have a habit of doing. Someone asked about the progress of this series and I realised people actually like it? So with renewed vigour, I went back to it and reworked what I had written of this chapter. In the next chapter: Sharky thinks that the Deputy has been giving him the cold shoulder and consults the Ryes. I’m still unsure where this is going but I guess all I can do is wing it and make things up as I go along as I always do. I greatly appreciate feedback or comments! Any ideas for future fics, series or the direction of this one are also welcome. Thank you for your support!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Deputy is so done with this train wreck and John won't shut up.

By the time Rook was led into the living room, everyone was already seated and plates of steaming food were laid out. She couldn’t deny that everything looked so very appetising, especially considering the fact that she hadn’t had a hot meal in so long. She didn’t exactly have time to sit down and cook proper meals for herself what with all the running around she had been doing. The Ryes and Mary May graciously fed her when she was around, nagging that she wasn’t taking proper care of herself. When she was on the run, however, she mostly lived off granola bars. A hot meal, even if it was cooked by the Seeds, was godsent at that moment.

At the creak of the floorboards, the brothers turned and Joseph caught Rook’s eye, smiling warmly. She squinted at him defiantly, face remaining indifferent but she couldn’t deny that she felt something when he looked at her like that, and it wasn’t hatred.

“Rook and I had a bit of an incident upstairs but we’ve calmed down considerably, right Rook?” Faith cooed, stroking Rook’s hair idly as she was led to her place at the table right beside Joseph. Joseph looked expectantly at Rook for her response.

“Sure,” she mumbled, staring at the food in front of her, still a little lightheaded from the bliss. The smell of food her mouth watering and she wanted nothing but to stuff her face and stop this awkward conversation.

“I see. Can we rely on you to behave during dinner or will we have to take more drastic measures?”

Rook felt like a child being scolded. She was completely out of her element surrounded by the Seeds.

“It’s fine. As long as it isn’t soggy mac and cheese we’re having, I’ll play nice.”

“Soggy mac and cheese? Where d'you hear about that?” John snapped and Jacob’s mouth immediately quirked into a grin.

“Nick Rye was pretty vocal about the incident,” Rook explained with a chuckle, leaning back slightly in her chair. For the first time in their presence, she felt a semblance of happiness in irritating the youngest though she knew it wouldn’t last long because Joseph would no doubt intervene and ruin her fun.

“Nick Rye is a fucking liar. That mac and cheese was perfectly fine.”

“John, language please,” Joseph chastised but otherwise made no further comments, neither confirming nor denying that the mac and cheese was horrendous and Rook turned to him for a moment to take in his amused expression. As much as he tried to convey the opposite, it was obvious he enjoyed her playful chatter and seeing his brother being harmlessly tormented like this.

“Oh god, it was you? I should’ve known.”

At this, Joseph decided to finally but in, no doubt eager to tuck in.

“As happy as I am that you are in a better mood now, I will say grace and I’d prefer it if you were all to calm down.”

She nodded slightly, giving a content sigh as she eyed the food and waited for Joseph to say his bit. When she could finally dig in, she could tell the others were giving her looks at the ferocity with which she shovelled the food into her mouth but they said nothing. Faith merely laughed a tinkling laugh at her enthusiasm and Joseph felt pride she was enjoying his cooking but the peace could only last so long when it came to John.

“So Deputy, what were you to do if I was to let slip to the resistance about this…”

Rook could tell he got a kick from irritating her, desperate to get a rise from her even when he was scolded by Joseph. She knew his threats weren’t empty and everyone would hear of her predicament before long but she simply rolled her eyes this time at the provocation. He really needed new material but he couldn’t exactly threaten to cut her up in front of his big brother.

Faith was the one to stop the bickering this time with a tut, pouting at John for upsetting the peace. “Guys, let’s not fight. This is a joyous occasion.”

“Faith is right. Are you really incapable of making our guest feel welcome, John? Rook, I apologise for their provocations. How about we talk about you?”

“Me? What about me?”

“We know how...dedicated you are to your job but I am curious as to how you got into this line of work. You don’t strike me as the law enforcement type.”

“What do I strike you as? The housewife type?”

Joseph chose to ignore her comment. “What got you here in the first place?”

“I wanted to do something meaningful and it doesn’t get any more meaningful than being a cop. Big fucking mistake.”

“It was a blessing,” Joseph corrected her, and Faith nodded vigorously in agreement. “You were destined to lead this path even if there have been some minor...bumps along the way.”

At this John practically jumped out of his seat and Jacob rolled his eyes at his youngest brother, placing a hand on his shoulder to keep him in place. As much as he found this situation entertaining, the bickering was getting old.

“Minor?” John spat out. “Months of hard work, lost to her, all because she and that idiot Boshaw can’t seem to step away from explosives. My yes sign? Demolished. Your statue? Rubble. And you call her transgressions minor?”

Joseph pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing. “John, we must forgive and put these things behind us. Of course, we have suffered from great losses but our dear Deputy was misguided, led astray by the sinners who called themselves her friends. But now she understands her place. Why else would she have come here?”

“Why did you come here, Rook? You realised that what we offered here was much better than anything your little friends gave you...right? That the Father’s love was all that you needed,” Faith asked.

“I don’t think I have to explain myself to you. I’m here now, why does it matter?”

“Are you sure it wasn’t your little resistance that sent you here?” Jacob piped up. Rooks snorted at the accusation.

“Things were just peachy before I came here. Why would they be so desperate as to send me to you guys? The resistance doesn’t know I’m here, okay? Though I doubt it’s going to stay like that for long seeing as John can’t keep his mouth shut and will run off to rub it into everyone’s faces the first chance he gets to spite me.”

“So Faith was correct?” Joseph asked, sounding hopeful.

“It was a matter of time before everyone found out. Someone blabbed the other day and now all of Fall’s End knows. I thought it would be more dignified to turn myself in before word reached John and he’d bliss me up and drag me here by force.”

“Our threats to capture you never stopped you before,” Jacob countered. John gave a laugh at that.

“Our dear Deputy is hiding, don’t you see? You are afraid. You know they won’t understand, will turn against you as soon as they found out and decided to seek refuge with us,” he explained, looking smug.

“I’m not a coward and they aren’t like that. It’s not like any of this was my choice. If I had a choice, there is no way in hell I would be Joseph’s soulmate.”

“Your words wound me, my child. I understand the conflict inside you but it is you who is making this much more difficult than it ought to be. You continue to fight it when you can simply let it consume you. You refuse to allow yourself to feel what I do, what anyone is meant to feel when they are in the presence of their beloved. If you would just give this a chance, you would see what I could offer you, how happy and loved this could make you.”

“Joseph, I’m going to be straight with you. I’m not going to sit here and pretend like everything is fine and dandy when your brothers are out their torturing people, your sister is drugging people and you condone all of this. I’m not going to just keep my mouth shut when people are suffering by your hand and you are hurting my friends. Maybe in another life, I would have been willing to give you a chance but quite frankly, you don’t deserve it given how things are right now. I told you I would stay and I mean, I have no choice in the matter right now. But I’m not going to pretend like I can love you and that this won’t end in disaster.”

It was with this outburst that Joseph gave up reasoning with her and stood abruptly.

“In time,” he murmured then turned to Faith, “Please take her to her room for the night. I shall see you all in the morning.” With that Joseph was gone and they were left sitting there in silence. With the low scrape of the chair against the floorboards, John followed suit, leaving for the ranch. Jacob glared in Rook’s direction but otherwise said nothing as he gathered up the plates and took them to the sink.

“I suppose it’s time for bed,” Faith said softly, giving Rook a small smile that didn’t reach her eyes.

“I remember where my room is,” Rook claimed. Faith called out a soft “goodnight” and watched at the bottom of the stairs, making sure Rook found her way before she too left the compound. Why did the Deputy have to be so difficult? Why couldn’t she just let the Father into her heart? Why couldn’t they just be a happy family?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back, babies! So I figured out how to make myself actually write and not put off my wips for years: start with the dialogue. It’s the most fun part, at least for me. I keep saying this but I’ll stress again that I still have no idea where I’m going with this but I’ll just..continue and see. I just know that Rook and Joe eventually get together okay? And there needs to be a lot of angst. The next part will most likely be with Sharky and the Ryes. People must have noticed the Deputy has gone awol. Who else do the people have to order around to go kill drugged up animals or catch weird fish or find their bobble heads for them?

**Author's Note:**

> I love soulmate aus. I love making my subjects suffer. This is the result. I don’t know where this story is going to go but there are more chapters to come. Romance and lovey dovey stuff might follow, probably. For now, here’s the Deputy reflecting on her shitty situation.


End file.
